#7

brain fog

Or When Your Brain Goes on Holiday

and Forgets to Tell You

I used to think menopause was just menopause. Then I found out there was perimenopause, postmenopause, the menopausal transition, the change…

No wonder they call it “the change”.

By the time you’ve learnt what to call it, it’s changed again.

Anyway, let’s talk about brain fog.

If I can remember what I was going to say.

You walk in.

Stop.

Look around.

“Why did I come in here?”

You open the fridge. Nothing. Close it. Then open it again, because surely there was something.

There wasn’t.

You start walking out. Halfway through the doorway, you remember.

Your phone. You were looking for your phone.

In the fridge?

No, hang on.

It’s in your hand.

You spend ten minutes looking for your glasses while wearing them. And the whole time, you’re wondering how you’re supposed to find anything when you can’t see properly.

Then you go to the supermarket and, of course, your reading glasses are at home.

Are you really going to ask a twenty-year-old:

“Excuse me, could you read the ingredients for me?”

Absolutely not.

Instead, you stand in the cereal bar aisle, pretending you’re making a very important decision.

You can’t read the ingredients.

You can’t read the best-before date.

You’re not entirely sure what flavour it is.

All the tiny letters have merged into one grey line.

At the till, you get your change out. Yes, I still pay with cash sometimes.

I live in Switzerland, where we have four silver coins that all look the same to me. Especially when my reading glasses are at home.

You turn them over. Hold them closer. Hold them further away.

Then you give up and offer the cashier the lot.

“Would you mind taking what you need?”

On the way home, you decide you’re buying more reading glasses. One pair for your handbag, one for the car, one for the kitchen.

That should sort it.

Until you need them. Then all three will be somewhere else.

There are about twelve remote controls in your house, and you always pick up the wrong one.

Your partner has shown you which buttons to press at least ten times. Every time, you listen. You nod. You understand.

Next evening:

“What does this one do?”

He looks at you.

You look at the remote.

Honestly, you’ve never seen it before in your life.

Apparently, your brain couldn’t be bothered to keep that information. So here we are again, starting from scratch.

It’s like someone restores your factory settings overnight.

And after another full explanation, you press the button.

The telly stays off.

Something else starts humming.

The best one is when you lose a word halfway through a sentence.

“I bumped into… oh, what’s her name… you know… the one who…”

No. They don’t know.

Neither do you.

You know her face. You know where she lives. You could probably tell them what she was wearing.

Her name? Gone.

Presumably, it’s wherever the missing socks are.

And everyone has advice.

“Write things down!”

Thank you. First, I need to remember what I was going to write down.

“Just concentrate!”

Oh, concentrate. Why didn’t I think of that?

I used to think getting older meant getting wiser.

I hadn’t realised I’d also be spending this much time trying to remember why I’d walked into the sitting room.

I like to think everything’s still in there. Someone’s just moved it without asking me.

Now every morning is a treasure hunt in my own head.

Some days, I find what I’m looking for. Other days, I find something I needed last Thursday.

Here’s a tip: when someone asks what you’re thinking about, just smile mysteriously.

They don’t need to know you’re wondering the same thing.

If your partner has spent five minutes looking for the glasses sitting on her nose, before you make a joke, just remember what else she’s had in her head all these years.

Every birthday in the family. The doctor’s appointments. The shopping list. The children’s PE kits. Your medication. The dog’s vaccinations. And the fact that there’s only one dishwasher tablet left.

For twenty or thirty years, she may have been the one remembering things for everyone.

Now she could do with a hand.

So instead of:

“Why do you keep forgetting everything?”

Try:

“What can I do to help?”

And if you’ve noticed the dishwasher tablets have run out, buy some. You don’t need to wait for instructions.

We’re still the same women. We’ve just got a few new things to get used to.

And occasionally, we’d appreciate someone else remembering where the glasses are.

#6

The Simple Joys We Forget in Midlife

And Why Books And Laughter Deserve More Space In Your Days than

They've Been Getting

When did you last get so absorbed in a book that the world simply... disappeared?

Or laughed so hard you snorted, then looked around hoping nobody heard? (Spoiler: they did, and it was glorious.)

If your honest answer is "I can't remember", you're in very good company. Somewhere between looking after everyone else and everything midlife asks of us, reading and laughing somehow slipped down the list. And enjoying your life should not always be the last item on it.

Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links. If you choose to buy through one of them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. Sometimes you'll receive a little discount too. Win-win. As an Amazon Associate, I earn from qualifying purchases. I only recommend products I genuinely use and trust, and would happily share with my friends and family.

Somewhere along the way, many of us picked up the idea that growth is serious business. That grown women don't have time to lose themselves in stories or giggle at something properly silly.

But perhaps what you need right now isn't another way to improve yourself. Perhaps it's a little more space to enjoy yourself.

Joy isn't the reward for finally finishing your to-do list. It's one of the reasons to keep going.

And that space might be waiting in the pages of a book that has been sitting on your nightstand for months, or in the kind of belly laugh that reminds you who you were before life got so busy.

Midlife is not the moment to shrink... except perhaps if we're talking about our waistlines, but that's another post for another day. In every other sense, this is when life finally starts making room for you again. This is your Second Spring, and it deserves better than playing it safe.

Don't forget to enjoy your life while you're finding your way back to your true self.

And reading for pleasure, whether you lose yourself in fiction, memoirs or essays, gives your mind somewhere kinder to go.

But the nicest part needs no study at all. You remember the woman who could lose herself in a story, long before anyone needed her to be sensible.

"A book is a dream that you hold in your hand." Neil Gaiman

These aren't just good reads. Each one has a knack for reminding you of something you already knew about yourself.

And a gentle reminder while we're here: there is no prize for finishing a book you stopped enjoying 120 pages ago. Life is too short, and libraries are too full.

The best reading habit isn't the one you keep because you "should". It's the one you look forward to.

"A book is not only a friend, it makes friends for you. When you have possessed a book with mind and spirit, you are enriched. But when you pass it on, you are enriched threefold." Henry Miller

"Humour is the great thing, the saving thing, after all. The minute it crops up, all our hardnesses yield, all our irritations and resentments flit away, and a sunny spirit takes their place." Mark Twain

"Laughter is the best medicine" is far older than the poster in your GP's waiting room. The idea goes back at least as far as Proverbs, where a merry heart is said to do good like medicine.

None of that is especially surprising if you've ever noticed how different the world looks after finishing a wonderful novel or laughing until your stomach hurts.

It's more than a proverb, though. When the writer Norman Cousins was diagnosed with a crippling illness, he famously made laughter, courage, and tenacity part of his recovery, working hand in hand with his physician. His pioneering work on humour and health continues today through the research centre that bears his name.

There's a name for the book side of this too: bibliotherapy, the practice of using literature for reflection and healing.

My favourite finding, though, is this: a sense of humour isn't a fixed talent you either have or don't. In a University of Zurich study, adults who took part in an eight-week humour training programme grew their sense of humour, and the people who knew them noticed the difference too.

So if yours has gone a bit quiet lately, it's never too late to find your way back to it.

I've come to think of humour as a kind of umbrella we carry over life. It doesn't stop the rain. It just changes how wet you get.

None of this requires a system. No tracker, no app, no bookshelf sending you reminders. And it certainly isn't about squeezing something useful out of every spare minute. It's about letting the moments you already have hold a little more joy.

Ten minutes with words you actually enjoy, before the news gets its hands on you.

Stories and laughter come in more forms than ever these days. An audiobook while the soup simmers. A funny podcast while you're washing up or out for a walk. An e-book on the train, so you can carry an entire library in your handbag. If sitting down with a paper book feels impossible some days, listening counts too.

Some days you'll want a thoughtful novel. Other days you'll need humorous books that make you laugh before page twenty. Both count.

Choose humour over overwhelm, even if that just means replaying a funny scene from last night's chapter, or sending that paragraph to the friend who will absolutely get it.

There's something quietly restorative about the moments just before bedtime. The dishes are done (or they can wait until tomorrow; they are remarkably patient), the notifications have finally gone quiet, and for the first time all day, nobody needs anything from you.

Consider stepping away from the scroll for those few minutes. The internet will manage without you.

This is where the paper book earns its special place. If sleep has been harder to come by lately, you're not alone; it's one of midlife's less charming party tricks. And many women find that a real book makes for a far calmer end to the day than another twenty minutes of scrolling. You may notice your breathing slow and your shoulders soften as your attention drifts away from the day.

It doesn't need to be perfect. Ten quiet minutes count. Choose a book that feeds you rather than drains you: one that makes you laugh out loud, or simply carries you somewhere far beyond the to-do list. Read the ones that make you want to turn just one more page. Uplifting books have a way of reminding us that tomorrow rarely feels quite as heavy after a good story.

It may not look like much. But ten minutes with a book, and perhaps a cup of tea that's gone cold because you forgot all about it, can change the feel of an entire evening.

And if you end up crying over the happiness of someone who does not technically exist, you are not alone. Good books have a habit of doing that.

If I'm being honest, over the past few years I've spent far more time reading business, marketing and personal development books than novels.

They've taught me a great deal, and I'm grateful for every one of them.

But somewhere along the way, I stopped making enough room for books that simply feed my soul.

Writing this article reminded me of that.

By the time I reached the final paragraph, I'd already pulled out my little collection of Márai books here in London.

My flat isn't big enough for elegant bookshelves.

My favourite books live in a basket.

Some books don't really need a bookshelf.

They simply need a place in our lives.

Seventeen years ago, I carried the English edition of Embers home, even though my English wasn't nearly good enough for it at the time.

Today, the very same book reminded me of something even more important.

Not every book has to make us more productive.

Not every page has to teach us how to achieve more.

Some books just remind us how to feel more alive.

The benefits of reading rarely arrive with fanfare. They simply show up in quieter evenings, gentler thoughts and mornings that begin a little lighter.

Perhaps I needed that reminder every bit as much as I hope someone else will.

Because in the end, this was never about filling every spare moment with something worthwhile. It's about letting the moments you already have hold a few more stories and a little more laughter.

So here's a simple idea: pick up a book and read one page. No target, no challenge, no need to turn it into a new habit by Monday. Just one page.

If you could recommend just one book to another woman in midlife, which one would it be… and why?

Let's fill the Midlife Mastery community with more stories, more laughter and more moments worth sharing. Recommend a book you loved, share a funny midlife moment, post a video that made you laugh, or just join the conversation.

Someone's next favourite book, or simply the smile they needed today, might come from you.

P.S. One last thing, just between us. There is a Hungarian song I have loved for years, and its message is beautifully simple: start living, so you'll have something to tell your grandchildren one day. I smiled when I realised that, in its own quiet way, this entire article has been saying the same thing.

If you're curious, here it is. You may not understand a word of it, but I have a feeling you'll understand its heart.

#5

The Perfect Bread for Midlife Women

Protein Sparing Bread - Recipe 1.0

Disclosure: This post contains affiliate links. If you choose to buy through one of them, I may earn a small commission at no extra cost to you. Sometimes you'll receive a little discount too. Win-win. As an Amazon Associate I earn from qualifying purchases. I only recommend products I genuinely use and trust, and would happily share with my friends and family.

A protein-sparing loaf may be exactly the solution you are looking for.

Some people simply call it egg white bread.

Although I love immersing myself in research, I too spent a long time searching for a bread that not only tasted good but genuinely supported our bodies through hormonal changes, without having to worry about extra weight as well.

I used to believe that bread and mindful eating could not sit at the same table.

Then, a few years ago, I discovered these quick and easy, high-protein egg white loaves, and they have been my ideal bread ever since.

You may find the same, especially if you also want to eat in a way that is aligned with your body's changing needs.

I named the basic loaf Protein-Sparing Bread 1.0 because every other variation starts with this one.

Just a few egg whites whipped to stiff peaks, egg white protein powder and a pinch of salt. It looks like traditional bread, slices beautifully and toasts well.

With butter or homemade mayonnaise and slices of boiled egg, the very first slice may be enough to convince you.

Read on to discover why it works so well after 40, how to make it, and how to avoid the mistakes beginners most often make.

Reinventing midlife can start with something as simple as changing what you put on your plate.

If ever there were a time to stop treating healthy eating as a punishment or a burden, it is during midlife.

We should see it for what it really is: the most respectful and loving way we can care for our bodies.

After all, nutrient-dense eating is one of the simplest and most important foundations of long-term health and wellbeing.

Of course, that does not mean we cannot sometimes eat something that nourishes the soul rather than the cells.

During midlife, we notice not only that our bodies are changing, but also that they no longer work in quite the same way they did ten or twenty years ago.

Alongside hormonal changes, the way your body uses energy also gradually changes.

Are you eating the same amount as before, yet your body responds differently?

You're not imagining it.

Let's look at what is actually happening.

After the age of 40, the body becomes increasingly less efficient at building and maintaining muscle mass.

Sarcopenia, the gradual loss of muscle associated with ageing, typically begins around this age and continues at around 0.5 to 1% per year.

Muscle, however, is not merely an anatomical term, nor is it important only because of how you look.

It allows you to carry your shopping bags, lift your grandchild, go walking, travel, and feel more energetic and stronger in everyday life.

Your muscles are your body's metabolic engine. They also protect your bones, which is particularly important at this stage of life, as it can help reduce the risk of fractures.

As well as contributing to the maintenance of bone density, muscle may help regulate blood sugar levels, and it may also support hormonal balance.

Building muscle is one of the best investments you can make in your longevity. Our muscles really are lifesavers!

That is why protein intake during midlife and the menopausal years is non-negotiable.

For a long time, I believed that a higher protein intake was mainly important for bodybuilders and athletes.

It was during a fitness trainer course that I first came across the idea that after age 40 – and especially during menopause – we need to pay much closer attention to our protein intake.

That is because the body gradually loses muscle mass during this stage of life, while the muscles also become less efficient at building new protein.

I must admit, I was surprised when I first learned this. After all, until we are personally affected, most of us never think to look into things like this.

And, in my experience, still very few women are aware of it, because unfortunately it is one of those important things that we are simply never taught at school.

Traditional bread, however, works against these goals.

It is high in calories but low in protein. The carbohydrates cause your blood sugar to rise quickly, only for you to feel hungry again an hour later.

On top of that, many shop-bought breads contain ultra-processed ingredients and additives, and some people simply feel better when they reduce their gluten intake.

Protein-Sparing Bread Variations  

One Base Recipe, Countless Possibilities

Since Protein-Sparing Bread became one of the foundations of metabolic nutrition, numerous variations have appeared across the keto, carnivore and PSMF communities.

I first discovered egg white breads thanks, in part, to the pioneering work of Maria Emmerich.

My heartfelt thanks also go to her and to all the other egg white bread queens. 

I've tried quite a few recipes, discovered which ones I like best, and learned which versions work best for different purposes.

At first, I found all these very similar variations rather confusing. That's why I started giving them version numbers for my own reference.

I never expected bread baking to become such a regular part of my weekly routine.

So, let's start with the simplest one!

What I Use to Make This Bread

You don't need a fancy kitchen for this bread, but a few good tools make it so much easier.

• A stand mixer: whipping the egg whites to really stiff peaks is the key step, and a stand mixer does the hard work for you. This is the Klarstein stand mixer I recommend.
• Measuring cups and spoons: the recipe uses American cup measurements, and that's how I measure too, so a set of measuring cups and spoons keeps things simple.
• A silicone spatula: I use one to gently move the whipped egg whites into the tin and to scrape the bowl clean. This set of three is a handy one to have.
• A loaf tin: pick the shape you prefer. This larger 3lb tin (about 29 x 14 cm) gives you a longer, lower loaf, while this smaller 2lb tin with deeper sides gives a shorter, taller one.
• A pinch of salt: You only need a little for this recipe. I like this Himalayan pink salt, but any salt you already have at home will work just fine.

This bread will keep for up to five days in the fridge when stored in an airtight container.

For longer storage, slice the loaf first and freeze the slices with baking paper between them. As soon as you take one out, it can go straight into the toaster.

Personally, I'm not the biggest fan of this bread as toast, but plenty of people love it. I'll leave that one up to you.

You can even use this basic recipe to make a pizza crust base.

As I mentioned earlier, Protein-Sparing Bread 1.0 is the foundation recipe and the version that is ideal for pure protein fasting days.

My personal favourite, however, is a different variation because it's the most versatile one. It works equally well as bread and as a dessert base.

If you're interested, I'd be happy to share that version with you in the future.

My Favourite Ways to Enjoy It

• As savoury or sweet French toast... alongside my morning Nootropics Coffee
• As the base for sandwiches
• Topped with eggs
• With homemade liver paté or meat spread
• Alongside rich stews or juicy meat dishes
• As the base for a hot tuna melt
• With sugar-free jam

Note: The basic 1.0 version is slightly drier than the richer variations, so it is at its best with creamy toppings or served alongside juicy dishes.

Breakfast as a Ritual

Every morning, you're choosing not only what to eat, but also the mindset with which you begin your day.

A healthy protein bread can become one of those small but meaningful morning rituals of conscious living.

Afterwards, you can step into your day knowing you've already taken one tiny but important step towards better health.

Your kitchen. Your midlife. Your rules.

Remember?

The one non-negotiable is protein.

One of the most important rules of eating well during midlife is to nourish your muscles according to what your body truly needs.

Now It's Your Turn

If you decide to bake your first Protein-Sparing Bread loaf, I'd love you to share your experience in our Midlife Mastery Facebook Group.

And don't be discouraged if your first loaf isn't perfect either. Mine certainly wasn't.

Sometimes the sides sink in a little, leaving the slices looking rather mushroom-shaped. Believe me, though, they're just as delicious. 

If you'd like to explore midlife nutrition, gut health, mindset, or other midlife-specific topics in greater depth, I also invite you to explore the Ultimate Midlife Guide.

Why did my Protein-Sparing Bread collapse?

Most often, it's because the egg whites weren't whipped to stiff enough peaks. Even a tiny drop of egg yolk, a trace of grease in the bowl, or slicing the loaf too soon can also cause it to collapse.

Why does my bread stick to the loaf tin?

You can lightly spray the tin with oil, but the easiest solution is to line it with baking paper. That way, the loaf comes out easily every time.

Is egg white powder the same as egg white protein powder?

Essentially, yes. Both are made from dried egg whites. You may also find it sold under different names, sometimes even as meringue powder.

Always check the label and choose pure dried egg whites without fillers, sweeteners or flavourings, with a protein content of at least 80%.

My personal tip: after testing a few brands, this egg white powder is the one I use for my own loaves. I had disappointing results with two others, so this is the only one I recommend.

Can I use egg whites from cartons instead of fresh eggs?

I don't recommend it. Carton egg whites are pasteurised, so they don't whip into the same stiff peaks as fresh egg whites. For this bread, fresh eggs are by far the better choice.

The yolks, meanwhile, can be used for homemade mayonnaise, spreads, pudding, or soups.

How much protein does a woman over 50 really need?

More than most of us were ever taught – if we were taught at all.

Research suggests around 1.2–1.6 grams of protein per kilogram of body weight per day, with approximately 25–30 grams per meal.

For a woman weighing 68 kg, that works out at roughly 80–110 grams per day.

Three slices of this bread provide approximately 27 grams of that total.

If you enjoyed this recipe, download my free recipe collection featuring dairy- and soy-free alternatives and more midlife-friendly recipes, all in one place.

Here is what you get:

• Dairy- and soy-free recipe ideas that make planning your meals simpler
• Midlife-friendly recipes designed to bring more variety to your everyday meals
• Everything in one place, ready whenever you need inspiration